life coach

Tread Lightly...

I used to be scared of wasps.

And what you see in the picture is a wasp sleeping... Well, she's actually taking a break from building her nest... Right outside of my bedroom door...

I've been observing this wasp for three weeks now and in that time period have had an interesting journey that began in fear and has now evolved into complete admiration.  

You see, not too long ago seeing a wasp in my house would have freaked me out enough for me to have had no qualms about getting rid of its nest. No thought would have been given to the animal involved in its creation in the name of self-preservation.

Today though, I can't help but wonder at the beauty and magnificence of this industrious and ultra dedicated wasp's creation!  In the three short weeks I've been observing her, every single time I pass my door, I've seen her working. Non stop. Every. Single. Day.

Oddly enough, this is actually the first time I don't see her busy at work building.

I did some research and it turns out that adult worker wasps are usually females who are building nests to safeguard their soon to be born young. In the case of this particular wasp, it also looks like rather than being an adult worker wasp, she's actually a Queen wasp due to her large size. I also learned that wasps are generally not a threat to humans unless they're messed with. (good news!)

Back to the story though...

So every day the wasp's nest grows just a little bit and every day I am made privy to the evolution of the simple yet intricate design she's creating which is beautiful in both form and function. Seeing this has made me develop a new appreciation for this incredible creature and has made me reconsider our relationship. 

You see, this little experiment in observation has made me realize that that nest is that wasp's life work. It's her masterpiece... It's her legacy and the future of her family. Knowing this, I understand that the wasp is simply living out her purpose. How could I ever consciously destroy her work?! What makes my manufactured 'peace of mind' more important than her survival? Isn't it possible for us to just co-exist in harmony with each other? Why should my misguided human fear be prioritized over her existence?

This has made me remember a beautiful quote I read not too long ago that says:

'Tread lightly on this earth and place your feet deliberately.' - Unknown

I couldn't agree more if I tried. In my mind, we're all wasps. We're all just trying to live our lives and we're trying to do this sharing one home.

It's important that we become conscious of the role that we play in our human communities but also in our ecosystem as a whole. It's important that we learn to respect each other's paths, work, timing, and existence.

It's important that we start operating from the understanding that we don't live in splendid isolation and that our actions have consequences.

What if we learned to be more gentle with the planet, with each other and with ourselves? If we did, wouldn't that be wonderful?





{I picked this piece by Bach for this post inspired by a conversation I had with a friend on Sunday about music as a medium for the achievement of ecstasy. We were discussing classical and my friend Peter brought up Bach...whom historically I'd never been a huge fan of.. I've always seen myself as more of a Mozart kind of girl since I studied opera in highschool. His argument was that Bach was the equivalent of (wo)man exhalting God and almost making an offering while Mozart was God speaking to (wo)man through music. This prompted me to give both another listen and I have to admit, I can totally understand why he said what he did and kind of agree. I also have a newfound appreciation for Bach, much like I do for the wasp living in my house. ;) }

In a Crisis? Good. Here's 3 Reasons Why.

I think it can universally be agreed that being in a crisis never feels good. However, it is in times of crisis that we are often pushed to grow out of our comfort zones and deepen our understanding of ourselves so there is a lot of gold to be found in these dark times that we go through.

This video is dedicated to all the physics geeks out there... Enjoy!

Good Vibrator #1: Wira

You don't have to be Elon Musk or have solved world hunger to have a positive impact on people's lives. Because of that, we've decided to start celebrating ordinary folks who put out extraordinary vibes into their communities. You know, good vibrators if you will. ;) 

In this first installment, I am excited to introduce you to Wira Kober from Ubud, Bali. May his infections laugh and goodvibery brighten your day! 


So... What Exactly is Coaching?

So, I asked you guys for help last week on Facebook and boy did you deliver! The first thing you gave me? A reality check. THANK YOU for reminding me that sometimes it's good to start with the basics...

With over 2,000 views is just 24hrs, we were overwhelmed by your support but also reminded of the fact that coaching is still a relatively young industry so an explanation was in order. If you've ever wondered what it is that coaches actually do, this one's for you!

If you'd like to skip the pleasantries and get to the core message, fast forward to 3:00. We realize it's a lengthy but we needed to express our gratitude to you for being so awesome! ❤ As always, feedback is most welcome and remember to subscribe, subscribe, subscribe!

Say Hello to Our Youtube Channel!

Hello Namasme community!

It is with great pride that we announce our new Youtube Channel! This has been a long time in the making and we're very excited to share this very special project with you. This particular initiative is very near and dear to my heart because it means I get to flex my creativity muscle once again for work and I couldn't be happier! 

On our channel you will find everything from book reviews, vlogs, interviews with inspirational figures, lifestyle hacks, and original mini films created and produced by yours truly. The common theme? 

All content will be designed to help you find your happy!

Remember it's your life, they're your choices and nobody can give you your freedom but you--so keep a look out in the next couple of weeks for some original content, let us know what you think, and subscribe here.

Much love to you all and thank you for being a part of this new chapter!





What To Do About The Annoying People in Your Life...

"All the world's a stage, And all the men and women merely players; They have their exits and their entrances..."

And oh, how right The Bard was. In this day and age though, even if we still have heroes, villains, lovers and everything in between, those entrances and exits are a little less clean cut that what I can imagine good ole' Shakespeare witnessing and scripting in the 1500's... Through social media we're hyper-connected so the community of 'players' we interact with on a daily basis is much larger and infinitely more complex than Shakespeare's.

In fact, as a modern human, you're likely find the following characters or a variation of them in the play that is your life (starting with the antagonists/villains):

The person you gave your all to and it wasn’t enough to keep them interested in a relationship...

That person who still thinks that you’re in love with them even though it’s been years, you’ve moved on, and it couldn’t be further from the truth...

The person who owes you an apology but still hasn't had the courage to ask for your forgiveness...

The person who always needs and gladly takes your help but who is incapable of reciprocity...

The person in your family or group of friends who knows just the right buttons to push to make you feel small...

The person who you feel obligated to keep in your life because you have history even though you feel like you no longer have anything in common with...

That person who makes you feel like life isn’t fair. They’re better looking, more successful, infinitely cooler, and so nice you can't hate them...

That person who has a ‘perfect relationship’ and it reminds you of how imperfect everything is in your own existing relationship or that being single sucks...

That person who has really lived life on their own terms and has had the courage to make moves you never felt capable of making yourself...

The person whose love you feel like you don’t deserve and it makes you feel guilty...

The person who after decimating your heart into a million pieces moved on faster than you did...

The person who you gave your trust to and who violated it more than once...

That person who made you feel like your best wasn’t good enough…In work, in life, in love... 

The person who never liked you and you never understood why. You were always nice, you were always open, you were always willing...

That person who you were a shitty friend to and who you desperately miss and wish you could show how much you’ve grown and changed...

The list goes on.

Like I said previously, if you’re the average person, chances are that many of 'these people' exist or have existed in your life. That means that A) you're probably one or more of 'those people' in somebody else's life and B) that 'those people' probably have these same people in their lives too. It helps to remember that.

It also helps to remember that these people are just people. People who are also trying to figure out this thing called life. People who are who they are and whose lives have no bearing on yours unless you allow them to. In fact, whatever meaning they bring to your experience is actually something that you gave them. What do I mean by that?

Well for starters, no, you actually don't hate (insert name here). You hate that when they're around or when you think of them you feel (insert negative emotion). People aren't emotions, they're people. We have a tendency of making them interchangeable and it causes us a lot of unecessary grief.

Please know that these people are in your life for a reason and that reason is to provide contrast and opportunities for growth. The people in your life who trigger negative emotions inside of you are actually just symbolic of something that is actually already happening inside of you. A reminder of an old wound that needs healing or of your over-active inner critic who is actually there to try to protect you.

So what to do? How to manage the presence of these unsavory characters in our life?

Well, if you don’t have to, don’t. Starting in social media land, the 'unfriend' and 'unfollow' features on Facebook come in handy for that. There’s no need to subject ourselves daily to negative triggers if we don’t have to… Especially from people who we don’t really spend time with in person anyway. It's time to give our inner masochistic-online-stalker-selves a rest. Poor things have been on overdrive for quite some time now.

However, seeing as that isn’t the only or even a sensible solution, particularly when some of the people in question are in our families, close groups of friends, etc., it serves us to realize that if we're going to give these folks energy, then that energy should at least be productive.

For example, if 'Mary', who makes you feel insecure makes an appearance in your mind, get curious as to why that is.

Observe your feelings, name them, and try to understand where they really stem from. What is it about this person that makes me feel this way? What do I feel like I’m lacking and how can I source it in my life so that I won’t continue to have this reaction? Is it security? Acceptance? Love? Dig my friend. Dig deep enough and I promise you will find!

If 'Joseph' (guess we're feeling biblical here) serves as a reminder of a part of your past or present that you wish you could re-do or change, then focus on what you can actually do to change it moving forward. Were you a shitty friend to this individual? Forgive yourself and look for the positive things that you learned from that experience/person. The relationship may be unsalvageable but that doesn't mean all is lost.

For example, in this particular case you’ll find that the experience actually taught you that being a good friend is important to you. It also helped you define what friendship really means because it is where you failed. Do you define friendship as words? Actions? Feelings? Knowing that is something that isn’t just useful, it’s something that you can infuse all of your current relationships with and doing so will make you a better human.

Life is too short to live in the past or to fall prey to comparison syndrome. Both will rob you of your happiness faster than you can imagine. Both also require energy which you could be using to build the life you actually want to live.

On that note, if you insist on focusing on others, then why not focus on the 'players' in your life who help you feel empowered, light, and happy, happy, happy? (The heroes or trusty sidekicks if you will)

You know, the person who always leaves you more energized after a conversation on the phone, a quick coffee, or a three hour crying session?

That person who you know will pick you up at the airport no matter what time it is or who will dog sit even though they’re allergic to pets?

That person who you can sit next to for hours and talk, do nothing, read, or just ‘be’ with with no pressure to ‘perform’?

The person who makes you feel like anything is possible. The one who allows you to dream out loud and who actually encourages to follow those dreams?

That person who makes you feel smart? Beautiful? Sexy? Wanted?

The person who asks real questions and who listens with real interest to what you have to say?

That person who inspires you to be a better version of yourself but who always makes you feel like you’re enough just the the way you are?

The person who personifies kindness and who brings it out in you when they’re around?

That person who makes you think a little bit deeper… About life, about work, about love?

That person who gives you a good dose of perspective wrapped in a sandwich of love and carefully crafted advice when you need it most without being righteous or preachy?

That person who will listen to you say things that are so horrible you’re afraid to voice them out loud but who you know won’t judge you for saying them?

The person who is familiar with your shadow side and doesn’t allow anybody, not even you to define yourself by it?

That person who looks at you like you’re magic? The one who at times knows you better than you know yourself and who loves you to the moon and back for it?

Again, the list goes on.

At the end of the day where you spend your energy is entirely up to you. However, I would be totally remiss if I didn't at least encourage you to consider spending your energy on the single most important person in your life. You know, the one you see in the mirror every day when you brush your teeth and get ready to 'adult'.

They’re the best and deserve a little recognition once in a while too.

Don't make me re-send that memo. ;)



(I picked 'La Yugular' by Alex Ferreira y El Frente Caribe as the song for this entry because it is what I'm sure many people wish they had the guts to say to a former lover who did them wrong. It is by all means a happy goodbye full of irony and colorful metaphors. The lyrics are hilarious and very very on point. I promise next post will feature a song in English for those who aren't Spanish speakers!)

A Value Judgment

Election time is always an interesting time to study human behavior. I’ve found that this election cycle in particular, with its storybook cast of characters (caricatures?) on both sides of the isle has given ample material for observation and spirited discussions on the state of American society and the leaders that represent it.

One of the most consistent words thrown around during election cycles is one that I personally never gave much thought to until recently but is one that every single politician wears like a badge of honor and a personal identifier: values.

Both conservatives and liberals alike tout their values as 'American' and they love to speak about them as if they're these clearly defined and unanimously prioritized concepts in our lives. Sure, everyone celebrates freedom, believes in integrity, wants equality, strives for courage... Everyone loves all of the things that make (or made?) America great. However, what most people don't question is what those words mean to the different people who use them as their personalized battle cries in the political arena.

I think it's safe to say that Donald Trump and Bernie Sanders probably have different ways of interpreting the meaning of these 'core' values but that's just speculation on my part...

Regardless, pretty much everything that has happened in the American political arena in the 239 years that we've been around as a nation provides a good example of how shifts in our collective perception determine which values dominate our public policy and what they actually mean to us at the time. They may drive us crazy during election time, we may be tired of hearing about them, but at the end of the day we actually pick what talking points our politicians use to court our votes.

Think about it. While our perceptions, actions, and resulting policies change as we claim to embrace our values, the values themselves never do. Our society and its progress have been defined by the same words over and over again and yet every time we fight a battle in the name of one of our values, we are fighting for something different... 

For example, The Civil War, The Women's Suffrage Movement, The Civil Rights Movement, and more recently the fight in the Supreme Court for same-sex marriage were all fought in the name of equality yet equality meant something different every time.

Does this tell us that as we become more aware of our fellow brothers' and sisters' struggles the meaning of equality changes in our collective consciousness to reflect that and we act accordingly? What exactly does the word equality mean to Americans now? Why are we still dealing with discrimination, racism, gender-based wage disparities, and other issues that still fall under the equality umbrella? What's our next "fight" going to be and where do I sign up?

While I have no answers for the questions above, all this reinforces my belief that values are more flexible than we care to admit because they change as we do. In my own experience I've found that my relationship with my values changes much like our collective one does as a nation... New awarenesses bring new definitions. New definitions lead to new actions. New actions lead to new habits, or in the case of government, policies. The more I learn about myself and the role I play in the world and my community, the more I realize just how connected I am to everything and everyone else. That awareness alone informs my actions and what I define as important. More relevantly to this post though, that awareness also informs my vote. (Go Bernie!)

The last 8 years have led me to believe that sociopolitically we're slowly becoming more inclusive as a nation. We still have a long way to go but I have faith in the youth of this country to keep us progressing towards a better future. I meet people every day that inspire me to keep expanding my own perceptions and to be a better person. I think we're waking up and realizing that the rat race we're being sold as success isn't really what it's made out to be. We're all slowly coming to terms with the fact that to make it as a nation and as a planet, we have to look out for each other.

To me, a lot of the misguided and judgmental bullshit we're presented with every day by the media doesn't seem representative of our generation and how we feel about each other but I may be wrong. Regardless, and like the song I chose for this post, I remain hopeful. I can't help but wonder though...

What's going to happen to our political process if and when we realize that we're all more similar than we are different?


(Written and originally sung by the legendary Sam Cooke after an incident where he was refused a hotel reservation for being black, 'Change Gonna Come' became an anthem for the Civil Rights Movement after Cooke's death and when it was covered by Otis Redding. Otis Redding's version is one of my favorite songs of all time and a great song for this post because regardless of the pain you hear in his voice and in the lyrics, the message remains hopeful.... Like me!)